You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again
The True Adventures of a Hollywood Nanny
By Suzanne Hansen
(Three Rivers Press, Paperback, 9780307237682, 304pp.)
Publication Date: December 26, 2006
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New and completely updated edition
Hilarious and addictive, this chronicle of a small-town girl’s stint as a celebrity nanny reveals what really happens in the diaper trenches of Hollywood.
When Oregon native Suzanne Hansen becomes a live-in nanny to the children of Hollywood über-agent Michael Ovitz, she thinks she’s found the job of her dreams. But Hansen’s behind-the-scenes access soon gets her much more than she bargained for: working twenty-four hours a day, juggling the shifting demands of the Hollywood elite, and struggling to comprehend wealth unimaginable to most Americans, not to mention dealing with the expected tantrums and the unexpected tense–and intense–atmosphere in the house where she lives with her employers.
When the thankless drudgery takes its toll and Hansen finally quits, her boss threatens to blackball her from ever nannying in Hollywood again. Discouraged but determined, Hansen manages to land gigs with Debra Winger and then Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman. Attentive, welcoming parents with a relaxed attitude toward celebrity–looks like Hansen’s fallen into a real-life happy ending. But the round-the-clock workdays continue, rubbing some of the glitter off L.A. living, and Hansen’s not sure how much longer she can pretend to be Mary Poppins. Even bosses who treat her like family can’t help as she struggles to find meaning in her work while living in a town that seems to lack respect for nannies and everyone else who comes in the employee’s entrance–but without whom many showbiz households would grind to a halt.
Peppering her own journey with true stories and high drama experienced by other nannies to the stars, Hansen offers an intriguing, entertaining mix of tales from the cribs of the rich and famous. You’ll Never Nanny in This Town Again is a treat for everyone who is fascinated by the skewed priorities of Tinseltown, for anyone who has wondered how high-wattage supermoms do it all, and for readers who love peeking behind the curtains of celebrity, all of whom will devour this unparalleled–and unabashedly true–account of one girl’s tour of duty as Hollywood’s hired help.
Suzanne Hansen has been a high-risk labor and delivery nurse, lactation consultant, and childbirth educator. She lives in Portland, Oregon, with her husband and two children.
"Filled with juicy little tidbits that will be enjoyed by anyone who loves to read about the bad behavior...of the rich and famous." —LA Times
"[A] story that Hansen tells with real comic energy, sparing no unlibelous detail." —Boston Globe
"After the publication of Hollywood nanny Suzanne Hansen's memoir, former employer and hardballing Uber-agent, Michael Ovitz might swear bitterly: You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again." —Vanity Fair, January 2006
"Think The Nanny Diaries, but juicier—and it's all true! Suzanne Hansen's tell-all book about her real-life adventures in Tinseltown babysitting (she was the nanny to the kids of super-scary super-agent Michael Ovitz) will have you howling with laughter—and rage." —Marie Claire magazine
"Veterans of the serving class ourselves, we thought we'd seen it all, but You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again offers an intriguing peek into the never-before-revealed family lives of Hollywood's elite. Hansen's memoir poignantly proves that truth can be more powerful than fiction." —Leanne Shear and Tracey Toomey, authors of The Perfect Manhattan
"A funny, absorbing true tale that will once again leave readers wondering why anyone would want to work in the insane asylum that is Hollywood." —Robin Lynn Williams, author of The Assistants
"Funny and engaging enough to be a novel, that You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again is true takes it to another level—a stunning exposé of our culture's impossible expectations of mothers." —Ariel Gore, author of The Hip Mama Survival Guide and The Mother Trip
"A jolly holiday with Mary it most certainly was not. At 18 years old, long before Nanny 911, Suzanne Hansen left the WiIlamette Valley of Cottage Grove to pair her au with late-'80s Hollywood excess... Hansen's just-released tell-all You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again chronicles her caregiving escapades with Debra Winger, Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman, and especially the Ovitz clan." —Portland Monthly magazine
“Veterans of the serving class ourselves, we thought we’d seen it all, but You’ll Never Nanny in This Town Again offers an intriguing peek into the never-before-revealed family lives of Hollywood’s elite. Hansen’s memoir poignantly proves that truth can be more powerful than fiction.” —Leanne Shear and Tracey Toomey, authors of The Perfect Manhattan
“Just when you think you’ve heard everything about the behind-the-scenes world of celebrities, along comes You’ll Never Nanny in This Town Again, a humorous yet down-to-earth account of the vagaries of warped Hollywood parenting. Author Suzanne Hansen’s experiences as an L.A. nanny expose the absurd–and yet achingly funny–differences between the rich and famous and the rest of us.” —Andrew Breitbart and Mark Ebner, authors of Hollywood, Interrupted
“A funny, absorbing true tale that will once again leave readers wondering why anyone would want to work in the insane asylum that is Hollywood.” —Robin Lynn Williams, author of The Assistants