Love and the Mystery of Betrayal (Paperback)

Recovering Your Trust and Faith After Trauma, Deception, and Loss of Love

By Sandra Lee Dennis

West County Press, 9780986068423, 302pp.

Publication Date: August 19, 2014

Other Editions of This Title:
Paperback (10/26/2018)

List Price: 18.95*
* Individual store prices may vary.


This achingly moving chronicle and meditation on the mysteries of love and betrayal shows how faith and love can triumph even after the most life-shattering revelations and loss. What is it like to recover from betrayal of trust today in a culture that is blind to the trauma and impatient with grief? When her long-time partner abruptly left shortly before their wedding, the author found nothing had prepared her for the depth and duration of the pain. She could not understand why this shock hit her so hard. Despite having endured her husband's death years earlier, she was stunned by the intensity of suffering. Her loss of faith in this one person precipitated an existential and spiritual crisis that called her very understanding of human nature into question.

She wanted to know why. As she wrested with what turned out to be a massive trauma, she began to keep careful notes of her inner life. She was intent on capturing the paradoxes of love, grief and longing mixed with bewilderment and post-traumatic stress. With bracing frankness and fearlessness, she succeeds. Love and the Mystery of Betrayal seamlessly blends research and reflection, love and heartbreak, rage and transformation, and the personal with the collective. The deep, engaging writing provides the type of solace only a kindred spirit who has been there can. This book blows the whistle on a culture that is blind to betrayal and denies and dismisses emotional suffering. Meanwhile, it guides you through the turmoil, pain and anguish with a gentle touch, understanding heart, and deep wisdom.

"This story of heartbreak has a rare quality: it is absolutely honest." -Ginette Paris, PhD, "Heartbreak"

..".a powerful book that will serve many." -Tara Brach, PhD, "Radical Acceptance," "True Refuge"

"Sandra Dennis does not sugar-coat the experience of abandonment and betrayal with easy tips on getting over it or with spiritual bypass sleight of hand.... A much needed contribution to our collective healing..." -Francis Weller, Founder of Wisdom Bridge, "Entering the Healing Ground"

"What Sandra Dennis tells us about the transformative power of suffering is so important and so true. I hope many read this book; many surely are in need of it." -Fr. Richard Rohr, "Silent Compassion," "Breathing Underwater"

..".a rare and beautiful book...invaluable for anyone interested in harnessing the deepest human heartbreak as a crucible for spiritual awakening....a triumph of spirit." -Miranda Macpherson, "Boundless Love"

..".a powerful and thoughtful book right from the heart that will be a source of comfort and assistance to a lot of hurting people." -Lundy Bancroft, "Why Does He Do That?"

..".probes the subject of betrayal in an almost kinesthetic way, like a dance that is also superbly intelligent." -Charlie Fisher, PhD," Meditation in the Wild" and "Dismantling Discontent"

"What a remarkable book Sandra Dennis has written I celebrate her courage and discoveries, and welcome her home " -Gangaji, "Hidden Treasure," "A Diamond in Your Pocket"

About the Author

SANDRA LEE DENNIS, PhD, obtained her B.A. and M.A. in from the University of Michigan, and her doctorate in Integral Studies/ Psychology and Religion, from the California Institute of Integral Studies. She is an author, teacher and explorer of the interplay of depth psychology and spirituality. She was a teacher in the Gurdjieff tradition for many years, an Ananda Yoga instructor, and a longtime student of the Diamond Heart work. She has been on the faculty of six universities, as well as the C.G. Jung Institute of San Francisco. Her practices of mindfulness, inquiry, yoga, and core energetics inform her writings and her work. Sandra currently lives and works in the Bay Area and can be reached through her website at