How to Be Alone (Paperback)

If You Want To, and Even If You Don't

By Lane Moore

Atria Books, 9781501178832, 224pp.

Publication Date: November 6, 2018

List Price: 16.00*
* Individual store prices may vary.


The former Sex & Relationships Editor for Cosmopolitan and host of the wildly popular comedy show Tinder Live with Lane Moore presents her poignant, funny, and deeply moving first book.

Lane Moore is rare performer who is equally impressive on stage—be it hosting her iconic show Tinder Live, or as the enigmatic frontwoman in It Was Romance—and on the page, as a former writer for The Onion and award-winning sex and relationships editor for Cosmopolitan. But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.

From spending the holidays alone, to having better “stranger luck” than with those closest to her, to feeling like the last hopeless romantic on earth, Lane reveals her powerful and entertaining journey in all its candor, anxiety, and ultimate acceptance—with humor always her bolstering force and greatest gift.

How to Be Alone is a must-read for anyone whose childhood still feels unresolved, who spends more time pretending to have friends online than feeling close to anyone in real life, who tries to have genuine, deep conversations in a roomful of people who would rather you not. Above all, it’s a book for anyone who desperately wants to feel less alone, and a little more connected just by reading her words.

About the Author

Lane Moore is an award-winning comedian, writer, actor, and musician. The New York Times called her comedy show Tinder Live “ingenious.” Her comedy and her band, It Was Romance, have been praised everywhere from Pitchfork to Vogue, and her writing has appeared everywhere from The New Yorker to The Onion. She is the former sex and relationships editor at Cosmopolitan, where she received a GLAAD Award for her groundbreaking work expanding the magazine’s queer coverage. She lives in Brooklyn with her dog-child Lights. You can follow Lane at @HelloLaneMoore on Instagram or visit

Praise For How to Be Alone: If You Want To, and Even If You Don't

How to Be Alone feels like peeling back your best friend's skull and jumping into into her brain. Lane is so open and funny and honest; I never want to be alone if it means I can't have her with me. What a gift.”— Samantha Irby, New York Times bestselling author of Meaty and We Are Never Meeting in Real Life

“Lane Moore is one of the most talented people I know and I’m so glad other people will be able to read her words.”— Mara Wilson, author of Where Am I Now?: True Stories of Girlhood and Accidental Fame

How to Be Alone is like a song that pops up on the radio and lifts your spirits . . . . so special, elegant, and true. It’s spectacular and truly personal in the sense that you’re constantly seeing Lane's intimate life and perspective on the world; that shadow dance of feeling for yourself without losing empathy. This book is with me every day, and it helps so much.”—  Caroline Kepnes, author of You, Hidden Bodies, and Providence

"How To Be Alone is the book I wish I had read in my early twenties. I truly believe it would have saved me a world of pain. Lane’s “stranger luck” certainly applies to me. The moment I met her I felt like I had known her my entire life. This book will make everyone smart enough to read it feel the same exact way."— Laura Benanti, Tony Award-winning actress