Pressured Parents, Stressed-Out Kids: Dealing with Competition While Raising a Successful Child (Paperback)
Dealing with Competition While Raising a Successful Child
Prometheus Books, 9781591025665, 290pp.
Publication Date: January 31, 2008
To help panicky parents deal with the torrential emotions stirred up by our competitive society, and to give them scientific knowledge about their children's growing years, leading child researcher Wendy Grolnick and educational and parenting journalist Kathy Seal offer this illuminating and accessible guide to channeling competitive anxiety into positive parenting. While evolution has given parents a genetic predisposition toward this protective anxiety whenever their children face today's heightened competition, the authors guide parents to avoid pushing and pressuring, turning their fear instead into calm guidance.
Distilling the results of thirty years of research in child psychology, the authors focus on three essential feelings autonomy, competence, and connectedness which parents can foster in their children to maximize the child's chances of success and minimize family conflict. They explain that granting kids autonomy lets them feel that they can solve their own problems and are responsible for their own actions. At the same time, providing structure gives kids the guidelines, information, limits, and consequences that they need to act in the world, instilling them with a feeling of competence. Finally, support from adults in the form of time and other resources provides children with a necessary feeling of connection and helps them internalize the ideas and values of their caring parents. Reassuring and empathic, Grolnick and Seal show parents how to avoid the burn-out in both parents and children that afflicts so many in our highly competitive society, while raising children who thrive and excel.
About the Author
Kathy Seal (Santa Monica, CA) is a nationally known parenting journalist and coauthor of Motivated Minds a Los Angeles Times bestseller. Her articles have appeared in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, Family Circle, and the Columbia Journalism Review, among other publications."
Praise For Pressured Parents, Stressed-Out Kids: Dealing with Competition While Raising a Successful Child…
"A first rate book. Even we sports fans who think competition can be good for kids have to admit that this book illuminates those moments when beating the other kid, or besting the family down the block, is distinctly unhealthy. The advice it offers to parents who feel real pain at such moments, who don't know how to control their own longing to succeed through their children, is the most sensible I have ever read."
--Jay Mathews, Washington Post columnist
"… required reading for all parents who want what is best for their children. They will be surprised and grateful for the many insights it provides on what really motivates kids. It is highly readable, scientifically grounded, and serves up generous helpings of valuable and practical information."
--Dr. Lawrence Balter, professor of applied psychology at New York University,
parent educator, and editor of Parenthood in America: An Encyclopedia